Wedding Information 2021
To start the wedding reservation process, please read the information below, then complete the inquiry form HERE.
WEDDINGS AT MEMORIAL CHURCH IN 2021
Weddings at Memorial Church continue to be a celebrated tradition at Stanford University. The church provides a beautiful sacred space for weddings with guest attendance from 2 to 1,200. Honoring its founding charter, Stanford welcomes all religious traditions and endeavors to create a memorable ceremony for all couples.
To be eligible to have a Wedding at Stanford Memorial Church, one member of the couple must qualify with a Stanford University affiliation, listed below.
- A student in a Stanford University degree program; an alumnus/alumna; a current or retired faculty or staff member of Stanford University, Stanford Hospital, or Lucile Packard Children’s Hospital.
- A present member of the Catholic Community at Stanford who is registered, participating and contributing for at least one year with a letter confirming that status from the priest.
- A regular, long-term present participant in Stanford’s University Public Worship
- A child or grandchild of a person in one of the categories listed above.
- A child or grandchild of a couple previously married at Memorial Church.
- Postdoctoral individuals at Stanford University are eligible if the ceremony is scheduled and takes place no later than six months after the final day of the post-doc program.
Weddings occur only on Saturdays at 11 a.m., 1 p.m., 3 p.m., or 5 p.m. Each couple has the use of the church for two hours (e.g., for a 5 p.m. wedding, the couple is welcome to arrive at 4 p.m. and complete their ceremony and photos no later than 6 p.m.) The wedding party and their guests must wait until their assigned arrival time to enter the church, the Round Room or the Bride’s Room. Ceremonies must begin on time.
*Please note: Wedding times will change in 2022.
To begin the reservation process, each couple must complete the inquiry form HERE. Through this form, couples can inquire about specific dates and times. A wedding date and time can then be reserved, which requires an initial deposit of $1,750 ($900 for current students).
After placing the deposit, the couple must meet with the Wedding Coordinator for a wedding orientation meeting. Orientation meetings typically take one hour. The meeting will include a tour of the church, and details about the wedding program will be reviewed. Note: Orientation meetings may be held virtually when COVID-19-related campus restrictions prohibit on-campus meetings.
Deposits and reservations are held for two weeks following the orientation meeting (or two months after the initial deposit placement, whichever is sooner) as a grace period to allow cancellation without penalty. After this period, the ceremony date becomes confirmed and the deposit will be processed as a nonrefundable fee.
Fees effective for wedding scheduled through the end of 2021.
The church fee covers the use of the church for both the rehearsal and ceremony, two audio CD’s of the ceremony, Wedding Coordinator, administrative staff, and premarital counseling sessions.
The clergy fee covers meetings with clergy to plan the ceremony, facilitating the rehearsal, and officiating at the ceremony.
The organist fee includes a music consultation and all organ service music.
The fee structure is as follows:
- $3500 Church Fee ($1,800 for current, full-time matriculating Stanford students whose ceremony will take place less than six months after Commencement)
- $1,750 deposit due to reserve a date/time, payable to Stanford University ($900 for current students)
- $1,750 remaining balance due three weeks prior to the ceremony ($900 for current students)
- $300 Organist’s Fee due three weeks prior to the ceremony
- $500 Clergy Fee due three weeks prior to the ceremony
The final payments are due 3 weeks prior to the ceremony. No exceptions.
Once payments are deposited, all fees are non-refundable. In the event of a returned check, a $50 fee applies.
In light of the current pandemic, Stanford continues to update its current policies for the health & safety of the Stanford community. If your wedding ceremony is impacted by the university’s COVID safety guidelines, you may postpone/reschedule your wedding to a later date at no-cost. If you choose to cancel your wedding ceremony due to the pandemic, you are entitled to a refund of your deposit (minus your Taylor Johnson Temperament Analysis and counseling fees, if already completed). Please contact the Wedding Coordinator directly should you choose one of these options.
RENEWAL OF VOWS
Wedding vow renewal ceremonies are permitted for couples that have been married at least 10 years.
The church fee covers the use of the church for both the rehearsal and ceremony, two audio CD’s of the ceremony, University Organist, Wedding Coordinator and administrative staff.
Renewal fees effective for ceremonies scheduled through 2021.
- $2,850: Church Fee
- $1,425 deposit due to reserve a date/time, payable to Stanford University
- $1,425 remaining balance due three weeks prior to the ceremony
- $ 300: Clergy Fee
- $ 300: Organist Fee
BLESSING OF A CIVIL UNION
Please note that it may be possible for couples already married in a civil ceremony to have a religious ceremony. This ritual is called a “Blessing of Civil Marriage” for non-Catholics; “Convalidation” for Catholics. The religious ceremony should take place as soon after the civil ceremony as possible. The process and fees are the same as a wedding, but the wording during the ceremony will differ
Like Memorial Church itself, the Stanford clergy team is committed to a multi-faith perspective, including non-Christian faiths. Guest clergy may be invited to assist in the ceremony. All couples, including those living outside the Bay Area, are required to contact their assigned clergy at least ten weeks prior to the ceremony and meet with them in person at least eight weeks before the ceremony. At this meeting, the couple and the clergy will discuss the overall ceremony, the vows to be exchanged, and any other details related to the ceremony.
Clergy who officiate at Memorial Church Weddings are a diverse group in many aspects, including religious background and gender. Clergy are assigned to officiate according to a predetermined schedule set approximately six months in advance; clergy may not be substituted.
At Catholic Weddings, priests from the Catholic Community at Stanford officiate. For a complete description of the Catholic wedding program please go to the Catholic Community at Stanford website http://web.stanfordcatholic.org/learn/sacraments/. The Catholic Church requires that the process (which includes paperwork and instruction) start at least six months in advance of the wedding date, and longer if either party has applied or needs to apply for an annulment.
We welcome non-Stanford clergy to assist in your ceremony. However, the Stanford Clergy assigned to your wedding will give the opening greeting, preside over your vows, do the pronouncement, and provide the final blessing. The Stanford Clergy will sign your marriage license, but Assisting Clergy will also sign our church wedding book and ceremonial certificate that you receive. Assisting Clergy must meet Stanford Clergy to discuss details of his or her participation, which might include prayers, readings, a reflection or homily, etc. We require that Assisting Clergy contact our Stanford Clergy no later than six weeks prior to your wedding day to discuss your ceremony. If the Assisting Clergy has not contacted our Stanford Clergy by the deadline, you will be unable to have other clergy assist at your ceremony.
The Wedding Coordinator is responsible for overseeing all aspects of the reservation process, rehearsal, and ceremony, ensuring that all guidelines and protocols are followed. The Wedding Coordinator oversees the rehearsal and ceremony, in conjunction with the clergy, making sure that plans are carried out in a timely manner. At the same time, it is the responsibility of the couple to meet all requirements and to follow the timeline.
Both bride and groom must appear together at a California County Clerk’s Office to obtain a marriage license. All non-confidential licenses may be obtained at any county office in California. The closest county office to Stanford is the San Mateo County Office located at 555 County Center in Redwood City. The Santa Clara County Office is at 70 W. Hedding Street in San Jose. Confidential marriage licenses must be obtained by applying within Santa Clara County. Premarital blood tests are not required by the State of California. Marriage licenses are only valid for 90 days prior to the wedding date.
Every couple married at Memorial Church is required to participate in premarital counseling. The clergy and their faith communities think it important that couples understand the nature and responsibilities of marriage and have a relationship based on mutual love and respect. Counseling will consist of a total of three hours of participation during which opportunities to understand each other, the relationship, and expectations about marriage will be discussed. Couples will select from a list of Stanford-affiliated counselors. Once counseling has been completed, the Wedding Coordinator (or Wedding Prep Director for Catholic ceremony) must be informed by the couple. At this time the couple will receive their clergy assignment.
Stanford’s wedding program is designed to be flexible and sensitive to a variety of ages and cultures. The Taylor Johnson Temperament Analysis or TJTA (taken online) serves as an instrument to guide meaningful discussion with the counselor. The Catholic Church requests copies of the TJTA profiles but at the same time, all clergy are to be kept apprised of matters where their professional training is useful to couples. In addition to the three hours of premarital counseling, an additional hour-long session may occur within the first year of marriage, at the discretion of each couple at an additional charge.
THE WEDDING REHEARSAL
Rehearsals provide the valuable opportunity to organize and rehearse the ceremony with the Wedding participants. Unless there are extenuating circumstances, the rehearsal is scheduled for the afternoon before the Wedding day and lasts approximately one hour. Participants include attendants, parents and family members involved in formal seating, readers, ushers, and guest clergy if applicable. It is imperative that everyone is punctual, especially since other rehearsals will take place before or after and the clergy will be asked to participate. If the rehearsal starts late due to a late arrival, the hour will not be extended.
Couples must bring the following items to the rehearsal:
- California Marriage License* with a stamped envelope addressed to the county clerk
- 5 copies of the wedding program
- Unity Candle, if couple is providing their own
Note: If the marriage license is not brought to the rehearsal, the couple is in danger of having their ceremony canceled. The couple must designate a volunteer to retrieve the license during the rehearsal, and it must be delivered before the end of the rehearsal hour.
Musical requests must be submitted to the assigned organist at least three weeks prior to the ceremony.
Only classical music (or music from the couple’s religious tradition) chosen by the couple consultation with the assigned organist will be played or sung. The couple will be asked to choose musical selections from a provided link. The link also includes vocal pieces performed by soloists who may be requested for a separate fee. Music begins approximately 15 minutes prior to the start of the ceremony.
Additional musicians (string quartet, pianist, soloist, etc.) must be approved by University Organist, Dr. Robert Huw Morgan. He may be reached by e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org or phone: (650)725-0503.
If a soloist or singer is desired, other than those suggested by the University Organist, he/she must abide by the following rules:
- Music selection must be cleared with the organist by providing a recording of a performance by the chosen artist(s) and
- The couple must arrange for piano accompaniment if needed.
- The organist always plays the processional and recessional.
PHOTOGRAPHER AND/OR VIDEOGRAPHER
Family and guests attending the ceremony must be informed, either informally before the ceremony day or by explicitly stating in the ceremony program that photography of any kind is not allowed during the ceremony. Professional photographers hired by the couple are the only ones permitted to shoot during the ceremony. It is the responsibility of the couple to inform members of the ceremony party, family, and hired professionals of the policies related to photography and videography in the church. The rules outlining professional photography and videography are designed especially for Memorial Church and intended to uphold the sanctity of the ceremony. The complete list of guidelines must be signed and acknowledged by the photographer/videographer prior to the ceremony day. Any specific questions or concerns must be asked in advance. On the day of the ceremony, the photographer and/or videographer must check in with the Wedding Coordinator at least 45 minutes prior to the ceremony start time.
The use of drones for filming or photography is prohibited per the University’s policy. For more information: https://orm.stanford.edu/drones.
Memorial Church has equipment for recording and/or amplifying the service. The videographer must make arrangements with the sound technician who will arrive 60 minutes prior to the ceremony. At the conclusion of the ceremony, and as a memento of the special day, you will receive two audio CD’s of your ceremony.
FORMAL & GENERAL SEATING
Guests are seated toward the front of the church in the center sections on either side of the main aisle. Bride and groom’s ‘sides’ are only observed for immediate family members and relatives. Family or friends who should be formally seated should be identified beforehand, so that the Wedding Coordinator can have them practice during the rehearsal.
The East Room is available as a dressing/waiting area and is available one hour prior to the ceremony start time. The East Room must be cleared out immediately after the ceremony, regardless of whether another ceremony party follows or not. One to two people should be appointed to be responsible for removing all belongings and seeing that the room is left as it was found. The Round Room is also available one hour prior to the ceremony for members members of the wedding party to gather. It is not a dressing area as there is not private space in this area.
Couples that expect fewer than 30 guests may choose to seat everyone on the Chancel located directly in front of the altar rail. This special arrangement must be discussed in advance with the clergy person and the Wedding Coordinator.
As a safety precaution, cloth runners are not permitted in the aisle and nothing may be tossed (e.g. flowers, rice, confetti, etc). All floral arrangements must be preassembled and may be delivered one hour prior to your ceremony at the earliest. Florists must be directed to the Round Room and can only deliver items on the day of the ceremony. Couples are responsible for providing the florist with delivery instructions and the gate code in order to enter and load behind the church. The Wedding Coordinator will provide the gate code one week prior to your ceremony.
At the rehearsal, the Wedding Coordinator will give each couple six passes for six vehicles to park directly in the back of the church on the day of the ceremony. Distribution of these passes is strictly up to the couple. The closest parking areas to the church are in the Palm Drive Oval or at Tresidder Memorial Union. The walk from either of these lots may take 10-15 minutes. Permit parking spaces in these lots are not enforced on weekends. In order to facilitate a smooth parking experience and ensure that guests will not miss the start of the ceremony, couples should notify guests of the parking challenges and encourage timely arrivals. A printable campus map can be found at https://transportation.stanford.edu/parking/purchase-a-parking-permit/visitors.
For people who are unable to walk prolonged distances, please contact the Diversity and Access Office at email@example.com or (650)725-0326 1-2 weeks prior to your ceremony. Wheelchair/disability access is located behind the church. Special parking provisions for the rehearsal are not available unless passes are requested in advance from the Diversity and Access Office.
If the reception venue will be on campus (e.g., The Stanford Faculty Club or Tresidder Memorial Union), it may be more convenient to direct guests to park near the reception and encourage them to walk to the church. Receptions are not allowed outside of the church or in the Main Quad area.
Alcohol or intoxication is not permitted at weddings or rehearsals at Memorial Church. This no drinking policy applies to the entirety of the church and surrounding areas. Intoxication can invalidate the rite of marriage and we reserve the right to limit participation of anyone in the ceremony who appears to be under the influence.